It Never Rains, by Kari Maaren 
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Monday, March 4, 2019
It Never Rains 832
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Hello, everyone. Yesterday was the 5th anniversary of It Never Rains, so click on "Previous" to see the special anniversary panel and my usual gushing commentary. I've also awoken to the fact that I haven't been including the headers in the transcripts, so from now on, every time a special header appears, I'll try to remind myself to include a description in the transcript on the first day. I didn't do the new header yesterday, but I've transcripted it up today; just scroll down to the bottom of the transcript box.
                                                                               
Monday, March 4, 2019
Panel 1: Rose and Future Rose stand in a grey hallway, in front of a white door.

Rose: They're in there. I can't quite hear what they're saying.

Future Rose [counts down on her fingers]: That won't be a problem. Three...two...

Panel 2: A tall man in his forties, who looks to be of Middle Eastern ancestry, appears. He's dressed in a brown jacket and grey slacks, and his hair is beginning to go white. He is waving a stethoscope. He lays a hand on Rose's arm and gently nudges her aside. And yes, West of Bathurst readers, it's Rahim Khan, so let's just call him that.

Rahim: Excuse me.

Panel 3: Rahim uses the stethoscope to eavesdrop on whatever is going on inside the room.

Rahim: Casey's suggesting a Doctor Who marathon, and Weird Beard's agreeing.

Panel 4: Rose jerks her thumb at Rahim.

Rose: And who's this guy now?

Future Rose: I'll make sure to find out. It's time for you to go back and talk to yourself ten minutes ago.

Alt-Text: RAHIM! I'VE BEEN MISSING YOU FOR FIVE WHOLE YEARS! *snf*

Special Anniversary Header:


Floaty words read, "It Never Rains by Kari Maaren." Twelve tiny black-and-white cartoon drawings are ranged across the banner, connected by a rough representation of what looks like a path. They are: 1) Teenage Iz trips teenage Rose, who is walking by with her white cane; 2) Maggie sits on a blanket on the sidewalk, next to a sign reading, "It Never Rains Consulting $1"; 3) Jennifer holds a smoking flask, and the smoke floats up to encompass the next image; 4) Rose glares and points at Maggie. They are standing and facing each other, their white canes crossed between them; 5) Kris argues with Jennifer, who is taking notes; 6) Jacqueline is holding a microscope, though she doesn't look happy about it; 7) Rose, in a nightgown, sits on a bare floor in a room under construction, a question mark floating over her head; 8) Iz watches Rose with thoughtful suspicion as she tries to look innocent. Meanwhile, Jennifer, also suspicious, peeks around her, and her Aunt Barbara waves frantically at her from the sidelines; 9) Kristi, who is dressed in a trench coat, holds a magnifying glass. She has a determined look on her face; 10) Weird Beard stands with one hand on his hip and one pointer finger raised. Rose stares at him; 11) Casey leans on his cane and smiles a diabolical smile as Rose, dressed in a blouse, a full knee-length black skirt, and white socks, spreads her hands in bafflement; 12) Iz has a full-on phobic reaction as Denise holds a mouse out towards him. Rose, between them, shrugs.

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Content copyright Kari Maaren 2014-2017
Images copyright Kari Maaren 2014-2017